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Keeping Gifts From An Ex

Got a question for Rachel, our Sex & Dating guru? Submit it below.

Q: My boyfriend and I moved in together earlier this year to save some money. Actually, he moved into my place after selling most of his stuff.  Everything is working out fine, as I expected because we have been together for a long time and it already felt like we lived together anyway with all the time spent at each other’s place.  The thing that’s bothering me is that he kept a mini sculpture that an ex had given him years ago. I never liked it and assumed he would sell it with everything else, but he still has it. Am I crazy that I see it only as a reminder of the ex instead of a piece of art? Or is he crazy for bringing it into my house? 

A: This isn’t a difficult question. You are not crazy; he is. I don’t think he’s necessarily wrong for keeping it because for all I know, it really is just a random piece of clay to him. But he is wrong for assuming you would be okay with having it in your home, yes. It must not have bothered you too much that he kept it since you managed to be with him happily all of this time. But now that you two have converged lives in a new way, it’s time to let certain stuff go. This isn’t his bachelor pad, it’s his and his girlfriend’s home. Mementos from exes, sentimental or not, shouldn’t be a part of the picture.

 

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